Life took me down a path where at age 36, I became a single mom of four kids, without a college education. A wonderful blessing came my way and I landed a job at a local state university. It was a modest salary but now I could support my family (well, mostly) and have health coverage for myself and my children. Perhaps the most exciting part of this new job was that it included the opportunity of taking college courses, for just $13 a semester! To attend a four-year university at a price like that? Well that was like a dream come true.
I enrolled in my first class and began my long journey toward a Bachelor’s degree. It was a blessing yes – but it was also getting an education the hard way – while trying to work full-time, raise a family, keep food on the table, order in the home and maintain my sanity. Between time in the classroom and the necessary homework, every milestone was hard fought for. Every “A” or “B” at the completion of a course was a cause for celebration, bringing me one step closer to the seemingly far-off goal of a college education.
There were many semesters I sat out because I just couldn’t do it, so my journey was slow. Years passed and the time came when my three older children had grown and left the home, and my youngest was now in high school. I was still working for the university, and by now all those hours I’d been racking up through the years had earned me the right to one day claim a modest pension when I retired. Educationally speaking, I was still plugging away.
In the big picture I was making progress, but the years of hard work, difficulty with making ends meet and the family responsibilities I had carried, had had an effect on how I saw my future. I felt my earning options were limited, my future cast in stone. To sum it up, I guess you could say I believed that I had missed the “success” boat early on, and it was never coming back.
By contrast, I had a close friend about my age but whose life, in some aspects, had taken a different path. After completing his Bachelor’s degree early on, he eventually obtained a Teaching Credential and then a Master’s Degree. He had financial success and options open to him that I thought would always be outside of my reach because of the lot in life I believed had become mine. This outlook all changed suddenly one night in 2009, as I sat in a Political Science class.
Always a fan of the Social Studies discipline, I was rapt with enjoyment in the lecture when suddenly I began to think, “This is so interesting to me, I wouldn’t mind having a degree in Political Science.” My mind wandered on. “In fact, I wouldn’t have to stop at a Bachelor’s degree, I could keep going and get a Master’s degree if I wanted.” That’s when the light began to come on. Before, all I could see was that I would eventually get a Bachelor’s degree, and I felt that nothing much would change in my life. Suddenly, I began to picture myself with a Master’s Degree, and ideas for a whole new future, one with many more career and financial options than I had ever envisioned for myself, began pouring in. This was a defining moment for me – because I began to see my limitations in a new way.
All of us have limitations. Some of them are real, some of them we self-impose – either consciously or subconsciously. If you would like to take a new look at some of your old “limitations,” you could start by considering some of the following questions:
Are inaccurate beliefs or misperceptions about what you can or can’t do, clouding your view? Is there something you are afraid of? Is there someone or something you feel is holding you back, that would not be if only you could learn how to stand up to them/it? Do you feel falsely limited by your age?
What you would do without your limitations? Would you pursue a career in a field you’ve never worked, but always wondered about? Start or complete a college education? Achieve an athletic goal? Master a difficult skill or talent? Maybe your dream would be to travel distant places. Or perhaps your dream is right here at home, in a relationship that is difficult right now, but with the right tools, could be redefined.
If these questions make you just a little bit excited, or cause a flame in your heart to burn just a little bit brighter, then I invite you to take a good look at what may be holding you back, and ask yourself, “Are my limitations real or perceived?” You just may see doors opening that you never saw before.
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